i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
Would it be considered cannibalistic if I wanted to eat off his bacon tattoo?
I just had a fifteen minute conversation with a Raccoon by the garbage bin. I was feeding it chex mix.
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
Yeeeaahhh, I'm in no rush to dismiss a level 6 booty-call that pays my bar tabs and understands my Harry Potter obsession.
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
So apparently, after 11 beers, 2 pitchers of sangria and 3 rhum & cokes, the idea of popping a load of MD and jumping on the trampoline, in the woods, in my underwear was the best one ever.
On a scale of 1 to shit show you were "i just pissed myself"
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
Randomize
