The vibrating part of my dildo broke, now I have to rely on gyration.
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
There is a car windscreen wiper in my handbag... Not my car's, not ok.
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
We got stoned and took selfies with the most perfect lawn
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
I almost wrecked my car because of a guy in skinny jeans had a boner
holy shit! you were walking down a hill and just happened to be passing a trash can like 4 ft away and projectile vomited over a fence into the trash can. kept walking and drank a beer.
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