If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
I wish you wouldn't refer to your breast milk as "ammunition"
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
You just met him on Thursday, and you've already nicknamed him Golden Penis?
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
We're like Siamese twins, but joined at the genitals.
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
I need a conscience and I need it yesterday.
Randomize