I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
I'm so hungover, I actually considered rolling down the stairs to avoid walking.
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
When I finally got there you were bleeding all over and you just kept saying over and over that the dog was your only friend at the party.
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
My vag has a bald spot. That is so middle aged. Is this my midlife crisis?
I took the weekend off because he and I were supposed to go to Vegas for our anniversary and get a hooker remember?
Ah, yes. Who says romance is dead?
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition.
She won. Twice.
My boss doesn't know what jello shots are. I've lost faith in this company.
Well I'm missing half a toenail if that's any indication of my night
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
Randomize
