he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
Yeah well I just ate cereal out of a muffin pan with a fork. I'll flip a coin as to who has to tackle that pile of dishes we've neglected for 3 weeks.
I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
When I told my mom I was having a rough time, she responded with "pop a xanax, take a nap, and when you wake up all will be right with the world." My mom is finally starting to shape up.
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
promise me that when we are 32, we will look nothing like Kim Zolciak. Promise me right this instant.
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
He said, "cum on daddy's dick!" ... I pictured my dad. That just scarred me for life.
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
I shall relish in being the most basic of bitches
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
Randomize
