i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
There's a litter of kittens in my bathtub and beer cans everywhere. I want my apartment key back.
so the girl i've been sleeping with for 3 weeks now just figured out that i don't know her name
I think being a buddhist has made me a better drunk
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
I just blew thrown up hashbrowns out my nose. That's the level of this hangover.
Look, his dick is so good at being a dick that it makes me see God. And I don't even believe in God.
Being high is definitely not the perfect addition to this family dinner. No. My grandma trips me the fuck out.
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