She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
Fastest way to get judgmental looks on a Sunday morning: wear sunglasses inside carrying a case of beer and thin mints at the grocery store. May or may not have ran into the glass door.
Gotta love Minnesota
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
I'm in public and Taylor Swift is playing. It is taking all my effort to not screech like a goat.
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
I don't get it. If he broke into Taco Bell at 2 am, then why couldn't he have brought me home a fucking taco???
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
what the fuck happened to the tacos
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