Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
My goal for tonight: make tomorrow as awkward as humanly possible.
My friend just ordered a beer and poured it on the floor in celebration of open bar night
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
CUM CAME OUT OF MY NOSE. MY SINUSES ARE ENTIRELY FUCKED UP NOW BC OF THE CUM TRAVELING IN PLACES IT SHOULD NOT HAVE.
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
Randomize
