So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
Just bought a breathalyzer and Sharpies, guess who thought of a new drinking game
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
The one with glasses said he was keeping my bra. He had me sign it before he left and he said he would be hanging it up in his bunker. I support our troops.
I unknowingly motorboated my boyfriend's ex-gf last night. Yay me!
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
The cat likes watching me spank Michael. I don’t know how to feel about this.
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