I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
The fact that both my ribs are severely bruised from shoving flasks in my bra might be a validation of my mothers alcoholic accusation
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
Just saw a 300lb woman fall down. Shes screaming like a beached manatee. Her 120lb boyfriend is trying to push her up. It's like watching an infant try to bench
fun fact: in my eskimo family tree i am the only brunette
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
The best thing about this time of year is that all I have to do is add a random mardi gras decoration to my cart full of alcohol and boom, no more judging
Dude, I need a fuckin wingman and this could finally make us eskimo brothers, how can you pass that up?
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
Randomize
