maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
Got a blowie from her in the cab on the way home. Made awkward eye contact with the cabbie who said, and I quote "Keep the mess in her mouth bro", I did so only out of respect
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
I'm so high that I'm intently watching my neighbor move his car back and forth in order to put his motorcycle in the garage, and getting irritated that it seems so complicated.
There's s woman at the corner of the bar dancing by herself in her seat and making eye contact with me. Please hurry.
Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
So this ukranian guy got angry and took his clothes off. Now he has my credit card and I can't find my keys.
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