I just found out the FDA voted to ban Vicodin, my last connection to this world has been destroyed
sperm doesn't mix with malibu too well
I went to go pee and found a strand of your hair wrapped around my penis.
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
... there are chew marks on my license. I have no idea.
I apologize for getting really drunk, taking off my shirt, bitching someone out, crying, and breaking something at your party next weekend...
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
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