We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
So...i'm having a drinking contest, my right hand vs my left, i have a feeling the 24 pack is gonna win
This is how we made chicken soup last night: Whole chicken in a pot of vodka with a box of crackers and some carrots. We should go pro.
A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor
I told her my hands were paint brushes and her vagina was my canvas
There's an old guy having a conversation with his penis in the bathroom right now.
I just recorded myself pooping, then uploaded to google drive, then connected to my pc through teamviewer then downloaded it, then played it to the living room while still pooping. God I love the internet.
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
the staff put glowsticks in the urinals of the porta-pottys last night and honestly drunk me has never been more grateful for anything in his life
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
Randomize