Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
Bad breakup?
He posted a pic of me fully naked and smiling as he inserted a carrot into my vagina as my FB profile pic and then changed the PW, locking me out of my own account. So 500 of my closest friends, family, and coworkers now have that mental image of me on FB.
I will kill you in such a brutal way if you ever de-pants me again on the dance floor it will make the stock market ticker
Can we just discuss how hundreds of miles away we were both beyond drunk and in some boys bed. That is the definition of friendship.
It was like in the Christmas carol when the guy pulls his robe back and 2 small children appear... except this time it was a massive scrotum
He just showed up on my porch naked with just a blanket and a trash bag
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
Randomize
