dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
i just had 3 doubles lined up on top of a urinal, texting with one hand and my dick in the other. I an fucking awesome.
He keeps apologizing for not being able to get hard when he's drunk. We havent even left the club yet.
So I'm pretty sure I fucked the dept of homeland security guy on my kitchen table. No recollection of it, but there are signs.
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
I just used celery as a chaser. That's the level of my refrigerator.
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
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