I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
When he brought me into his room he showed me his James Bond calendar and matching sheets, and then told me that his goal in life is to be James Bond….epic fail. Mission Impossible. I was scared to take off his boxers to find out that they were also James Bond themed.
RUN LIKE YOUR JAMES BOND
yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG
You're incredible, and I'm drunk
Umm I might be late. Also I am may or may not have mayonnaise on my ass
Randomize
