Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
his text ended with ... everyone knows dot dot dot equals infer sexy time
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
My mom just said we needed to put weed into our earthquake kit.
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
You know, I had the money for a pregnancy test, but at the time, tacos were more important.
I have sand in every orifice, there are bruises everywhere, and I smell like a distillery. I love summer.
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
Who was the girl that woke me up at 4am to tell me "there's an emergency, we need you to come smoke weed"
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
I love how encouraging you are, but I need you to stop me when the guy I'm going home with is a dead ringer for Nick Cage.
i can eat my weight in tater tots. don't test me, bitch
Just saw a commercial for non alcoholic baileys cream. WHAT THE HELL IS THE POINT?!
Randomize
