I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
just saw a midget ride a motorized cooler into the liquor store. i'm gonna follow him home.
The boys in front of me put beer, red plastic cups, ping pong balls, lighterfluid, and twelve packs of pantyhose on the conveyor belt. Whatever drinking game they're playing, I want a part in.
Aren't you glad we're at the point in our relationship where I don't even ask why you're hiding in the cabinet?
Do you know anything about the Easter basket sitting on my doorstep filled with porn and peeps?
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
I think there's a problem with society when I'm shopping for lingerie and I think "man some of these would make kickass shirts"
Rigtt?!
My dad's girlfriend is driving through the snow to bring me my purple haze. If he doesn't wife her up, we have a bigger issue on our hands.
I had a rough night. I'm just gonna lay here and masturbate for a while before I have to go adult.
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
Randomize
