shit is crazy. i just keep thinking that this kid growing inside Emily used to live in my balls.
she's googling pictures of Freddy Mercury and whispering 'I'm ready'
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
You don't understand. He was so ginger that he could make red hair a dominant gene. And I refuse to torture my future spawn like that.
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
Beyoncé wouldn't let anything bad happen here
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
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