woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
she was definitely wearing a bumpit. i think it was the hollywood bumpit. i told her that i lived with my parents to get outta taking her home.
Totally just asked Dad if I needed to show the real estate guy my tits so he would let us buy the house. I've really got to work on that filtering thing.
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
She said she couldn't sleep with a guy who had blood stains on his ceiling. I tried to explain it wasn't my blood, but she still left :(
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
Well, when he's back from China he's probably gonna be pissed I used the spare key he gave me to prove to everyone I'm fucking an NBA player. We took all his booze too.
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
From what I can tell at a cursory glance, it seems that last night I fell asleep on string cheese and it melted into my bra.
I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality
There's that certain point at night when you start saying things like s'mores should be used in foreign relations. I reached it.
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
Randomize
