youre so sexy i want your bod
dude, did you turn gay?
heather?
this is jacob
i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
it would be so handy to have a fax machine attached to my body
I wish I could understand how you function in society
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
I'm putting you on my Emergency card so i can spend the last ounce of strength in my hospital bed to flip you off.
Drunk girl in a bikini just tried to bite my face, it's officially spring break
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
Some girls wake up to good morning texts. I wake up to pictures of an angry Shrek getting a blowjob.
Me-World Problems: do I have my boyfriend come to my birthday party in drag, or is that too weird for the first time meeting literally any of my friends
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
Randomize
