Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
It feels like I shit a light bulb that shattered on the way out.
you kept lifting my skirt up, yelling "PANTY PARTY". needless to say, you're at the top of my father's shit list right now.
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
I don't know who's more excited for you to come home. Me or my vagina
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
I'm her ex, so unless you're interested in her massive moral failings and open season vagina, I'm not your guy.
Randomize
