i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
just served this dwarf dude an entire pitcher of malt liquor. watching this will totally be worth my bartender's certification.
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
You can't spell "party" without "RA."
You know what else you can't spell it without? "Gonna get fired."
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
For dinner, I'm having saltines, canned whipped cream, and beer. Are we sure I'm responsible enough for home ownership?
Please remind me next time not to call the ex who cheated on me to cry about the ex who forgave me for putting him in prison. It would be much appreciated.
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
When I woke up I was spooning with a block of cheese. Like, cuddling. Me and the cheese we nestling...
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