if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
We are two peas in an std pod
I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.
Halfway through he got an idea for a short story so he wrote it in magic marker on my boobs. Yeah, he's a keeper.
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
Too bad pet owners lack respect for my training in ancient Buddhist and holistic rehab therapies.
I'm not sure the Buddhist consider pot brownies holistic rehab therapy
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
Just went to court for a citation. Guess who my DA was? That girl I ATM'd last weekend. No ticket for me!
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
Randomize
