Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
it was like eating out sand paper
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
I'm at verizon, the guy asked me why my phone is full of seeds. Deff. Not leaving my phone with you anymore.
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
Penises. Everywhere.
You're. Welcome.
You slapped the bar and yelled "daddys thirsty!" at the lady behind the bar
To be fair I was thirsty
When she told you not to yell you looked directly at me and screamed "Man, she sucks!"
A 3am FaceTime to go to IHOP is the closest thing to a bootycall that I'm getting
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
I have a few Facebook friends I only keep around for quality control purposes on Tinder
THERE IS WATER LITERALLY DRIPPING OFF OF THE CHANDELIER. I OFFICIALLY HAVE THE WORLD'S WORST RAINFALL SHOWER HEAD.
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