conclusion of the day: americans need to get on tredmills, people need to learn how to flush toliets and learn how to pee in then instead of on them, and waiters shouldnt tell their life stories to customers.
Masturbating after my cheeseburger. It's unavoidable.
You were parading around the bar chugging girls drinks and then asking them if you could buy them a drink. It was actually genius
even after i explained my bobby knight costume the bartender still kicked me out for throwing the chair
Are you for fucking real.? He divorced me just because he got a fucking girlfriend.?!
I just encountered the most annoying guy on the planet. I wanted to slap his milkshake out of his fat-boy hands while he was talking to me at the same time as slurping his liquid fat.
I love milkshakes.
Not the point.
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
He has no idea I'm scrolling through Instagram while he's going down on me. I'm so bored.
Get your heels and tits on! I’m not wasting a Brazilian because his fucking kid ate paste or Legos and ruined an afternoon suite sex and room service
Randomize
