like literally i think i'm sweating out semen right now
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
He told me I handled myself pretty well considering how drunk I was. He failed to realize that the lollipop I had was one I found on the ground a few minutes before hand.
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
Just got that "I know what's going on with your vagina" look from that CVS cashier.
You bought MORE?!
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
it's my favorite when the couple downstairs are having sex so loud that i feel like I'm part of a threesome
second-hand sex is fun, isn't it?
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
I think I gotta smoke less weed, I'm getting to lazy to fuck my girlfriend
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
I'm a peeled potato compared to her. I'm a peeled potato compared to anyone. I'm a peeled potato.
Are you high?
Randomize