yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
You were scared that your teeth were shrinking so you stuck your fist in your mouth. then you were convinced your hand was growing cuz it got stuck so yu started crying
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
They called me at 5 AM saying they had a present for me
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
You were sending me snapchats from a bathtub with your beer helmet on and your boobs out.
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
Why is there puke in my guitar?
Because you puked in your guitar.
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
I may or may not be sitting in a bubble bath drinking wine, watching Jurassic park, and wearing a Russian fur hat.
Please don't give away my fajitas
I just gave a fucking twenty minute blowiob.. I'm a GOOD girlfriend.
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