Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
Remind me to tell you the Scottish bar story tomorrow
Remind me to tell you it was a shitty story when you're done telling it tomorrow
yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
To the person who left a cup of vomit in the bathroom: I commend you for your aim but you are dead to me- not an ideal birthday present.
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
Can you check on Mike in the bathroom. It's been like 20 min.
He's fine. He's just standing at the trash can in line for another beer from the keg. Nbd.
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
Leave it to me and my dad to puke on the same guy at the same bar 25 years apart
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
Walked into the bathroom and saw a Minion eating out Harley Quinn so this Halloween will be hard to top.
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
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