Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
I think it's safe to say taking shots on the way to the emergency room was rock bottom. We're going to need to think of ways to top that between now and next new years eve...
Used my phone to vibrate 'eye of the tiger'. It's like Rocky is punching my nuts, but gently.
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
He told me he loved me. I didn't know what to say so i just squirted the baby oil at him
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
I ate breakfast with him. And by ate breakfast I mean we fucked on the kitchen table.
I sang Seal's Kiss From a Rose to my quesadilla
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
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