is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
What changed your mind?
Being sober
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
I had to warn the neighbors
Warn them about what?! It's noon
"Pay no attention to me if at random points of the day I'm outside with kitty cat ears on" I'm a mess...
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
She said, after pronouncing how sober she was, and I quote 'Take this bag, it's so heavy it's like 500 degrees! Wait, is it time to go? Can I run? I think I can run!' Then she ran away.
I completely forgot I gave up beer. But airports don't count. They're like international waters. No rules.
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
My car insurance payment showed up today, so no inflatable hot tub for now. Sorry to disappoint.
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
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