need another drink. this is the easiest way
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
Im eating ham and mustard naked, watching south park, but its totally cool cuz the paper plate is covering my nuts
pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
I should probably file for unemployment. Sometime between last night and 4 AM I facebooked my manager the lyrics to hoe by ludacris. I'm just projecting ahead here.
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
Just went grocery shopping with a vibrator in my purse and didn't even realize it. This is what Saturdays are made for.
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
I’m glad they have a happy marriage but why do they have to inflict it on the rest of us?
Randomize
