what happened last night?
u kept telling him to fuck u optimus prime style
that explains why his roommate kept saying autobots roll out this morning as i left
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
I just spiked the applesauce. Try to tell me again your party is better.
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
Hey so summary of last night. I threw up in a rain boot then tipped it over on my bed, did my laundry and passed the fuck out. I feel like I didn't see you.
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
That unicorn pillow pet really made sleeping with my head in the toilet a little better.
Sheila knows I only go down on her on Bastille Day. Valentine's Day we get high and watch The Neverending Story. THE SYSTEM WORKS.
My vagina is officially offended.
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
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