doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
on the list of things i learned today that are not stripper poles: ex-boyfriends, table legs, and police officers.
I like my landing strip. Makes me feel sophisticated.
What you did last night can never be called sophisticated. I don't care how you trim your pubes.
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
That bitch makes my crazy look like a walk in the park with cotton candy
Look, when i woke up this morning, I had every intention of being a responsible twenty-five year old, cleaning up, making my budget, and filing my taxes. Its just I got siderailed by pot and downloading classic Disney songs, because fuck adulthood; everyone loves Disney.
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
There's a potato with a bite taken out of it in the kitchen
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
Why did I wake up with a half-eaten burrito and a vaccuum cleaner in my bed? ...on top of me.
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