she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
Did you push me into the oil wrestling or did I elect to do it?
You said you wanted to do it, but I gave you a friendly nudge.
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
I'm pretty sure you called me last night and screamed that she was force-feeding you a bagel.
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
I feel like the devil slapped me in the face with his dick.
Birthday success
I remember eating bacon bits off your chest that night... I'll never look at bacon pizza the same way
I've Ubered to the bar three times this weekend to get my car but every time I get there I end up drinking. Still no car.
Woke up with a $100 bill from the Philippines in my bra & an unopened box of sour patch kids next to me. I have some questions.
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
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