How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
If I had a nickel for every time somebody called me a bad person I would have enough money to check into rehab
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
It's not my fault. Someone keeps buying me tequila shots. Idk who. But every time I look down there's another. I think there's a conspiracy.
Our whole friendship has just been time foreshadowing my dick in your mouth.
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
I shoulda been born a dude. There's too much power in a vagina.
lol hangovers are for mortals.
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
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