Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
Question: Is it too early to claim April Fools on the text "can we do some lines before the concert" that I accidentally sent Mom?
this whole plan B standoff thing with her is really starting to make me nervous
This weekend has taught me that sometimes, being buried under a mattress is the safest place in the room.
I just yelled at my mom for getting me circumcised without my permission. That drunk
Gave him an awesome blow job on his living room couch last night, so at least he'll have something nice to think about next time he's watching the Tigers lose.
We left the knife in your bed.
It was going alright when lo and behold Tom the cock blocking tornado hits. He is the only man I know who doesn't want anyone to fuck girls.
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
I kind of really want to call off the engagement but I kind of need his mom's mashed potatoes on thanksgiving so I'm between a rock & a hard place here
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
He was actually surprised when I poured myself a glass full of straight vodka. Clearly he doesn't know me as well as he thinks.
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