Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
Listen up tinkerbell, You're gonna come to the bar, hit on some fat chicks, and step up when I punch someone in the face.
What's the politically correct way of saying you've made someone your bitch?
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
Oh, AND I met a ukulele teacher that I'd date. So there's that.
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
it'll be like the notebook except for with way more of my penis
I made out with him in the club and he endorsed me on Linkedin. My networking skills are off the charts.
I wish I could say this wasn't the first time I shit myself in a Piggly Wiggly.
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
Randomize