I think i ate a live goldfish last night. that i caught with my hand in a kiddie pool. my stomach really hurts.
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
Ive decided I'm sending thank you notes to all the bars for graduation.
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
Hey, I think I showed you a picture of my nephew while we were fucking last night. Sorry, I know it's weird, I just really love that kid. Again, sorry.
Best day ever, my junk is bigger than Kate Uptons boyfriends. Yay for Fappening day!
I just realized I wasn't at the party anymore. I was just sitting there with a vacuum.
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
Success! We fucked roommates!
So random question: what's a good way to tell your brother that his Skype sex kept you awake last night? I'm not really sure how that conversation begins.
Randomize