Hey man sorry I got all grabby
that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
Food lion is just a portal. Cheetos are the goal. Its like not banging a super hot chick cause she is french. She still has the same parts just from a different box.
Now I am going to fly my toy helicopter in the dark.
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
I'M NOT EVEN STOPPING FOR WINE SO I CAN GET TO THAT DICK QUICKER.
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
