Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
We held a candle light vigil outside the jail hoping for her release, until we realized we were drunk in the jail parking lot.
You mowed a straight line through three yards because you were, and I fucking quote, "In the zone." I think they know.
you made out with another girl for some wings
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
Listen, some people have dreams, some people just want to cock slap a kangaroo
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
my mom walked in on me eating her out, and i can never kiss my mother again.
Optimism doesn't exist before 2pm nor do any other emotions.
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
Randomize
