so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
This is the last time I call a hotel to see if you or some random guy paid for the room last night.
i don't think my family understands the severity of a twenty first birthday.
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
I gave up sex for lent.
I guess that means I'm postponing our date until after Easter.
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
FYI don't ever, ever get a lap dance from a stripper who says " she's having a bad day " at a bachelor party.
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
At what point in my life was I not hugged enough to be on my fourth walk of shame in half as many weeks?
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
I would've fucked Winston Churchill - rode that D like I was going into battle.
Randomize
