Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
I'm sitting in my bathroom sink, eating a tuna sandwich. He had better weed than I expected.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
He referred to his penis as "a gentle giant" and said I had offended it
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
you know you're drunk when you start breaking down your body composition into organic molecules
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
there must be tiny pirates in the freezer stealing our rum.
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
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