She looked like cheddar but tasted like limburger...
once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
The trick is to not slur when purchasing the condoms at 3am
Hangovers were designed by God when he decided that so far he had taken it WAY TOO EASY on me.
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
All he wants to do is masturbate while I sit there with my big toe up his ass that is not even the worst part of it.
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
I'm still drunk. it's summer. I just need a hot dog and an aspirin.
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
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