His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
I think I've hugged the toilet more times than I've hugged my own family members.
Just coerced a Santa to buy me a handle. Tis the season.
when she first told me she hooked up with him my initial response was to shout "WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!"
I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it.
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
That's cool. At least the punch line of my story isn't I shit in a booth at Denny's.
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
His favorite positions involve choking me out. I'm marrying him.
Your heart isn't making stupid decisions... your penis is outsmarting your brain. Stop fucking her!
I don't know why, but whenever I shave my balls I feel more aerodynamic.
The guy in the cage next to me is having phone sex. His girlfriend is in College Library. Why is my life ridiculous.
Randomize
