He just turned on a sound machine. I need to get the fuck out of here.
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
Remember when I was so high that I thought my appendix burst? All I had to do was fart man, just fart.
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
I moved my bed to the living room so when a girl walks in she has to decide right away if shes in or out
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
I'm sitting here drinking whisky and listening to The Wiggles, I don't need a social life
I stopped telling people I'm a pansexual unless they ask first, really tired of explaining what that means.
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
Randomize
