I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
I have a great idea. you just need to get pregnant.
Mother, no, i will not talk about this again. Please stop planning my unborn daughters life. I will not put her in pagents. That is trashy. Stop watching toddlers in tiaras. It is also trashy. I love you.
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
Last time I was your wingman I had to deal with a girl whose only interest in my body was to clip my toenails. I'm not interested.
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
I have tasted many bathrooms
Randomize
