So there is this guy preaching the word of God outside our club. I went up to him and said, "God made this body, and he made it for premarital sex." Sup, Hell?
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
How could I forget your birthday? I have an alarm in my phone to ask you for sex that day.
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
He was Jesus for Halloween and I definitely got on my knees and gave him praise.
I am buying anal lube, an enema, and a bag of kit kats. What part of this is compelling the Walgreens woman to tell me to "be well".
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
I sign my lease Thursday, I'm about to be released back into the wild.
I'll make missing person signs.
You're a good friend.
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
"I mean like shit happens" should never be an excuse for anything
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