You made me cry and you don't even care
I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
Just realized the fur coat I am wearing to the wedding is the one I had sex with the groom in
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
Batchelotette party success. I woke up on the floor in nothing but a thong, a garter and a shirt that says Just Do Me.
So while you were living in this woman's apartment, you acquired a room mate, fucked her daughter, and killed her bunny. Worst sitter ever
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
I just projectile vomited into my kitchen sink. Today need to be over already.
The cup holder in my recliner holds a whole bottle of wine. That's definitely a sign.
Are you ok? Who pooped in my office?
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