i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
some girl just asked me if I was that guy that hooked up with nine girls in one night. officially a local celebrity. gonna try and autograph her boobs.
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
idk i was trying to watch Fuller House and you got up out of a dead sleep, just in your boxers, said "no more Dave Coulier" and walked out to the living room and unplugged the router
No clue what you did last night, sorry. You did hand me a pizza and a mason jar with $1200 in small bills in it when I let you in though.
1st date with cop went weird. He yelled at me & we had a horrible date. Walking to the car I tripped & started bleeding & then he made out with me. Is it wrong that I want to see him again?
THIS IS WHY YOU NEED THERAPY!
Randomize
